So i spent most of yesterday pretty quiet and depressed trying to figure out jus what happened between sunday night and now.

I heard the news early monday morning like most did, that Sean Taylor got shot. To be honest with you, I just thought that it was just that.. he got shot, he'll go to the hospital, he probably will miss the season, but he'd be back.

As I was sitting at work, I started getting all these texts and emails and people asking me.. "did you hear?, did you hear?"

But it wasn't until I started looking for more updates on his condition did I realize how serious this actually could get. I started looking up what a femoral artery was, how badly it could affect you by being shot in it, and endlessly searching the web for any new information I could get.

As the day went on, it was literally a rollercoaster of feelings and emotions. I read he was in a coma, he hadn't regained consciousness, and the thoughts of having to prepare myself for the worst began to creep into my head. Later, I talked to my cousin who works for Easterns Automotive (the same company that has all the Skins stars in their commercials) and he had heard that Sean was doing better, that he was showing signs of responsiveness. I breathed a sigh of relief that it will be all aite.

No one ever wants to wake up the way many of us did on Tuesday morning. My girl woke me up in a hurry to let me know nothing other than "He died."

I can't say I don't know why this is affecting me so much. He was my favorite player on the defense of my favorite team. A team that I invest alot of myself in. A team that I follow, that I love, a team that I live for, with a passion unrivaled. I know that many other fans feel the way I do. When we talk about the team, we say "we" not "them. Fans are a part of the team. I never got to meet Sean, but there's a bond between player and fan that cannot be described nor replicated. I seriously feel like I lost a family member. It's hard to think that I'll never see #21 run out of that tunnel again. I'll never see any of his bone crushing hits again. I won't see him running down the field with his eyes as a crossheir locked on anyone with the ball. at 24, he has his whole life ahead of him.

What's even worse is Sean won't get to see any of those things anymore. And most important, he won't get to see his baby girl grow.

We miss you Sean....